Artists Unite To Defend S.O.D.’s Induction Into Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame With Tribute Album
When the story broke last month that the legendary New York City crossover band Stormtroopers Of Death had been inducted into this year’s class of the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame, critics and other media types went into a bit of an uproar. The controversial band, featuring Billy Milano on vocals, Scott Ian on guitar, Dan Lilker on bass and Charlie Benante on drums defied all odds with this mainstream milestone, made much more impressive that they achieved this without any real airplay in their 27 years together. This was not the only point of contention, of course, as their lyrical themes are coarse, at best, and given that humor has been outlawed on all but one planet in this Solar System (c’mon Neptune, what are you waiting for?), then band delivers nothing of note to the public, except of course to those of us who write run-on sentences.
However, an unexpected twist developed when other members of the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame stood up for their new comrades. To support this induction, other members of the RRHoF have worked hard this last month to quickly generate a tribute album to S.O.D. Tentatively titled “Speak English Or Don’t”, sales from this record are going toward throwing the biggest party since Impaled Nazarene played Barack Obama’s 2009 Inauguration. Extra proceeds will benefit the “No Turning Back Women’s Driving Fund.”
Jerry Lee Lewis kicks things off with his energetic cover of “March Of The Stormtroopers Of Death/Sergeant D. & The S.O.D”. That leads right into the Beach Boys doing “Kill Yourself” followed by Aretha Franklin’s soulful “Milano Mosh.” Elton John tears into the seminal “Speak English Or Die” in the way that only a knighted British lad can. Al Green and The Rolling Stones then team up for “United Forces (Peaches & Herb-style).” Pink Floyd delivers on a medley of “Chromatic Death”, “Pi Alpha Nu”, and “Anti-Procrastination Song”, seemingly to prove to the world that they can handle short songs while still retaining their trademark atmosphere. The Eagles deliver a bland version of “Freddy Krueger” followed by the Bee Gees giving us “Milk”. Fleetwood Mac then does the medley version of “Pre-Menstrual Princess Blues/Pussywhipped”. Billy Joel amps up a double speed version of “Fist Banging Mania” with the aforementioned Charlie Benante himself contributing drum tracks. “No Turning Back” is given a new twist by Earth, Wind, and Fire, and then the album is closed out by James Taylor and Paul Simon collaborating on “F**k The Middle East.” Yes, they even sing in asterisks as a stand against those who stand against people who stand against censorship.
How will the public react? Time will tell, but one thing is for sure… Cleveland is about to get rocked.
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